Dear Cleveland, All Of Northeast Ohio
and Cleveland Cavaliers Supporters Wherever You May Be Tonight;
As
you now know, our would-be savior, who played in the very region that he
deserted this morning, no longer wants to be a Cleveland Cavalier.
This
was announced after a several day, narcissistic, self-promotional build-up
culminating with an interview on national TV of his "decision" unlike
anything ever "witnessed" in the history of sports and probably the
history of entertainment since 2010.
Clearly,
this is bitterly disappointing to all of us.
The
good news is that the ownership team and the rest of the hard-working, underpaid, loyal,
and hard-driven staff over here at your hometown Cavaliers have not betrayed you nor
NEVER will betray you.
There
is so much more to tell you about the events of the recent past and our more
than exciting future of one year. Over the next several days and weeks, we will be
communicating much of that to you.
You
simply don't deserve this kind of cowardly betrayal by somebody named "Chauncey."
You
have given so much and deserve so much more.
In
the meantime, I want to make one statement to you tonight:
"I
PERSONALLY GUARANTEE THAT THE CLEVELAND CAVALIERS WILL WIN AN NBA CHAMPIONSHIP
BEFORE CHAUNCEY BILLUPS WINS ONE"
Wait...
You
can take it to the bank. Or to Quicken Loans (usurious rates apply).
If
you thought we were motivated before today to bring hardware to Cleveland, then you were mistaken. I can tell you that this shameful display of selfishness by
one of my own friends who begged me to let him work on my plantation has shifted our "motivation"
to previously unknown and previously never experienced levels in the history of sports and probably the history of entertainment since 2010.
Some
people think they should go to heaven but NOT have to die to get there.
Sorry,
but that's simply not how it works. You have to DIE to get there. I'll show him.
This
shocking act of disloyalty from my own "chosen one" sends the exact
opposite lesson of what we would want our children to learn which is loyalty is
a one-way street that DEAD ends. And "who" we would want them to
grow-up to become which is a blood-sucking, money-grubbing pawnshop owner.
The good news is that this heartless and callous action will not serve as the
antidote to the so-called "curse" on Cleveland, Ohio.
Chauncey lol will not be taking the "curse" with him. It stays right here with
me. And you. And until he does "right" by me and agrees to work on
the plantation we will own this spell and karma together.
Just
watch.
Sleep
well, Chauncey lol.
Tomorrow
is a new and much brighter day which you will never see....
I
PROMISE you that our energy, focus, capital, knowledge and experience will be
directed at one thing and one thing only:
DELIVERING
ME more money that is long deserved and is long overdue...
Dan
Gilbert
Majority
Owner
Cleveland
Cavaliers