Sunday, April 21, 2013

I daydream of two responses to the Thomas L. Friedman Question. I imagine that I am sitting next to him and he is distracted, maybe he is waiting to speak and he puts his head back and closes his eyes briefly. Contemplating. I seize the opportunity and grab his head to stabilize it. I surprise him by Luis  Suarezing his nose. His little legs would kick out and his arms would flail but I would have a shark-like grip on his nose. I don't think my teeth are sharp enough or my jaw muscles strong enough to bite his nose off but I could probably require him to get stitches. He would be totally humiliated and look ridiculous for at least the time I was in jail.

My second fantasy is less violent, more humiliating to Friedman but I don't think I could pull it off logistically. It is taken from a book by Rebecca Solnit. Two guys had a long-standing feud in old frontier California. One was much bigger and stronger than the other. Every time the big strong guy would see the smaller Feiedmanesque guy he would approach him and with his vastly superior strength force the Friedman guy's head back and then force Friedman's jaws open (That's the part I don't think I could do) and then spit into Friedman's mouth. Every time he saw Friedman he'd do that.

Good night.