Where's Rick Perry? Is he still locked up? In court maybe? Has anybody heard from the Texas A&M cheerleader since Texas has become ground zero of the Ebola epidemic in America? Honestly, I haven't. Haven't read that he's uttered a PEEP.

Perry, you were all over Obama a couple months ago, telling him "Secure our borders." In Iowa, you said "If the president doesn't secure our borders, Texas will." Great, then we have a plan: Mr. President, if you would please secure Texas' northern, eastern, and western borders Rick says he'll take care of the southern.