Another crappy fixture list in the Premier League this weekend.

Saturday:

Cardiff City
v
Newcastle United 7:30 AM


Rise and shine for that one! No.


Everton
v
Southampton 10:00 AM


Leicester City
v
Wolverhampton Wanderers 10:00 AM


It seems like there are 16 teams that got promoted this year.


Tottenham Hotspur
v
Fulham 10:00 AM


West Ham United
v
AFC Bournemouth 10:00 AM


Chelsea
v
Arsenal 12:30 PM

Whaddya mean Chelsea v Arsenal? Dude, this is not your grandfather's Chelsea v Arsenal. Not Mou v Wenger. Not 1 v 2 or 2 v 3. This is 5 v 6 from last season. You want me to get wood for 5 v 6? No.


Sunday, August 19

Burnley
v
Watford 8:30 AM


Burnley v Watford, Jesus Christ.


Manchester City
v
Huddersfield Town 8:30 AM


Brighton & Hove Albion
v
Manchester United


Dreary, dreary me.