The confetti fell in Philadelphia tonight...

...and young Ben Simmons SLAMMED! home two of his 16 points...

... as the young "7'6"'ers" got back in the series against Baws...

Oh.

The score was tied when the confetti fell. It was tied at the end of regulation when the confetti fell. There was no call for any falling of confetti. It was a premature ejaculation of confetti. 

They had to "clean up" the premature ejaculation which had spewed all over the Hard Wood Court (great porn name). 

And the confetti fell no mo. Bos beat Phi in OT 101-98.

Oh. And young Ben Simmons MISSED! that dunk. No, I do not know how young Ben Simmons missed that dunk. Let's look at it a-gain.

Form looks perfecto upon approach, the common, emphatic "Tomahawk" approach. Notice the absence of green-clad "Fighting Potato Eaters" contesting young Ben Simmons Tomahawk Slamma Jamma. 

What...in...the...fuckingfuck? The ball is entwined in the fucking twine. How...

And yet...there it go. Bouncing off the frigging...twine? They need to check the tensile strength of that twine, man. Is that frigging titanium twine. How did that fucking happen...I see it and I don't believe it.  WELL, IT DID. Ours is not to ask how. Ours is to ask why Philadelphia is so fuck-ed up-ed. Puritan Boston and Quaker Philadelphia? Hey! Works for me!

And, guess who is winning the Cleve-Tonto game in the Pawn Shop? There is 2:16 left in the 3Q. I'll give you ONE hint.