My God, that is a bizarre headline. It meets all the criteria for H.o.t.D., which it is. We make analysis:
1. It is oxymoronic that any event could me both "minor" and merit a headline. Right?
2. Even if the event is intelligible:
A. You're telling me there's a volcano in Cleveland: Oh yeah, I think I vaguely remember something...No. No, there is no volcano in, "at," or near Cleveland, Ohio. The closest thing would be Dan Gilbert and he's Jewish, not Vulcan.
B. If there was a volcano near Cleveland and there was an "explosion" at said non-existent volcano, that event could not be said to be " "minor" as there are still some people left near Cleveland since LeBron James departed, which volcanic explosion would imperil them...Hmm, maybe an exploding volcano near Cleveland would be "minor."
1. Okay fine! A volcano exploding in the CENTER of Cleveland would be minor. Fine with me!
a. Then why is this insignificant bird pump of an event getting a frigging HEADLINE?
i...In Seattle, frigging, Washington?
ii. For Gods sake.
iii. Huh?
iv. Isn't there a Starbucks store opening or closing somewhere that would be of more interest to "Great Northwest" Ooh, you're the Great Northwest, we are SOO impressed homos than a frigging "minor" explosion of a little volcano in Cleveland, frigging OHIO?
v. Or are the Great Northwestern Headline Writers in Seattle still pissed that the Sonics left town and are jealous of the good people of Cleveland because at least Cleveland still has a minor league basketball team. Ha-ha-ha-ha Seattle go root for the Thunder!
vi. And because the Kings aren't moving to Seattle from Excremento? Ah, King County and you wouldn't even have had to change the nickname would you? Ha-ha-ha-ha Ah, that's a shame Seattle, you Great Northwest LOSERS.
vii. You make me sick.
1. It is oxymoronic that any event could me both "minor" and merit a headline. Right?
2. Even if the event is intelligible:
A. You're telling me there's a volcano in Cleveland: Oh yeah, I think I vaguely remember something...No. No, there is no volcano in, "at," or near Cleveland, Ohio. The closest thing would be Dan Gilbert and he's Jewish, not Vulcan.
B. If there was a volcano near Cleveland and there was an "explosion" at said non-existent volcano, that event could not be said to be " "minor" as there are still some people left near Cleveland since LeBron James departed, which volcanic explosion would imperil them...Hmm, maybe an exploding volcano near Cleveland would be "minor."
1. Okay fine! A volcano exploding in the CENTER of Cleveland would be minor. Fine with me!
a. Then why is this insignificant bird pump of an event getting a frigging HEADLINE?
i...In Seattle, frigging, Washington?
ii. For Gods sake.
iii. Huh?
iv. Isn't there a Starbucks store opening or closing somewhere that would be of more interest to "Great Northwest" Ooh, you're the Great Northwest, we are SOO impressed homos than a frigging "minor" explosion of a little volcano in Cleveland, frigging OHIO?
v. Or are the Great Northwestern Headline Writers in Seattle still pissed that the Sonics left town and are jealous of the good people of Cleveland because at least Cleveland still has a minor league basketball team. Ha-ha-ha-ha Seattle go root for the Thunder!
vi. And because the Kings aren't moving to Seattle from Excremento? Ah, King County and you wouldn't even have had to change the nickname would you? Ha-ha-ha-ha Ah, that's a shame Seattle, you Great Northwest LOSERS.
vii. You make me sick.
