And now for the sporting news. Jameis Winston...
Whoa-oh-ohohohohoh, ohohohohoh, ohohohohoh!
...plays football and baseball for Florida State University.
Whoa-oh-ohohohohoh, ohohohohoh, ohohohohoh!
Jameis plays tackle football really, I mean really, really good--well. He won the Heisman Trophy...
Whoa-oh-ohohohohoh, ohohohohoh...Alright, enough.
...and the "Seminoles" won the national championship this year!
Whoa-oh...Shut the fff up!
Jameis and FSU's rise was not without controversy, however.
Oh?
Jameis was accused of RAPE! before the season even had started.
:o
The police however did one of these-here,
SHHHHH!
anddidn'treportittotheD.A. When the D.A. found out about it he was maaad but decided there was not enough evidence to prosecute Jameis in court...
Whoa-oh and Jameis and Half-Ass U ohohohohoh were allowed to finish the season and win the aforesaid Heisman Trophy OHOHOHOHOH and national championship.
OHOHOHOHOH!
The New York Times...
hiss pft-pft.
...did an investigation on the rape allegation and it t'weren't flattering.http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2014/04/16/sports/errors-in-inquiry-on-rape-allegations-against-fsu-jameis-winston.html?_r=0
Boo-ooh-oohoohoohoohooh, oohoohoohoohooh, oohoohoohoohooh.
The United States Department of Education's Office for Civil Rights has opened an investigation of Florida State's handling of the rape allegation.
No-oh ohohohohoh...
Then on Tuesday night, it seems Jameis went to a supermarket and--ALLEGEDLY--helped himself to $32.72 worth of crab legs and crawfish without "technically" paying, like, the $32.72 on accounta he forgot. That is what is called the crime of "petit theft" and the local gendarme arrested Jameis...Wait a minute, wait a minute, it says they didn't arrest him...
WHOA!-OH OHOHOHOHOH! OHOHOHOHOH! OHOHOHOHOH!
...They gave him something called an "adult civil citation," WHOA!-OH...what the hell is an "adult civil citation?"
HOHOHOHOHO
And the police guy who told the media about the "civil citation" said of the civil citation defendant:
"He was very cooperative and he seemed fairly honest in that he did not pay for the item."
HOHOHOHOHO He was honest because he didn't pay for them! He was honest "in that" he didn't pay for them?!
HOHOHOHOHO!
Whoa-oh-ohohohohoh, ohohohohoh, ohohohohoh!
...plays football and baseball for Florida State University.
Whoa-oh-ohohohohoh, ohohohohoh, ohohohohoh!
Jameis plays tackle football really, I mean really, really good--well. He won the Heisman Trophy...
Whoa-oh-ohohohohoh, ohohohohoh...Alright, enough.
...and the "Seminoles" won the national championship this year!
Whoa-oh...Shut the fff up!
Jameis and FSU's rise was not without controversy, however.
Oh?
Jameis was accused of RAPE! before the season even had started.
:o
The police however did one of these-here,
SHHHHH!
anddidn'treportittotheD.A. When the D.A. found out about it he was maaad but decided there was not enough evidence to prosecute Jameis in court...
Whoa-oh and Jameis and Half-Ass U ohohohohoh were allowed to finish the season and win the aforesaid Heisman Trophy OHOHOHOHOH and national championship.
OHOHOHOHOH!
The New York Times...
hiss pft-pft.
...did an investigation on the rape allegation and it t'weren't flattering.http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2014/04/16/sports/errors-in-inquiry-on-rape-allegations-against-fsu-jameis-winston.html?_r=0
Boo-ooh-oohoohoohoohooh, oohoohoohoohooh, oohoohoohoohooh.
The United States Department of Education's Office for Civil Rights has opened an investigation of Florida State's handling of the rape allegation.
No-oh ohohohohoh...
Then on Tuesday night, it seems Jameis went to a supermarket and--ALLEGEDLY--helped himself to $32.72 worth of crab legs and crawfish without "technically" paying, like, the $32.72 on accounta he forgot. That is what is called the crime of "petit theft" and the local gendarme arrested Jameis...Wait a minute, wait a minute, it says they didn't arrest him...
WHOA!-OH OHOHOHOHOH! OHOHOHOHOH! OHOHOHOHOH!
...They gave him something called an "adult civil citation," WHOA!-OH...what the hell is an "adult civil citation?"
HOHOHOHOHO
And the police guy who told the media about the "civil citation" said of the civil citation defendant:
"He was very cooperative and he seemed fairly honest in that he did not pay for the item."
HOHOHOHOHO He was honest because he didn't pay for them! He was honest "in that" he didn't pay for them?!
HOHOHOHOHO!
