An AFC Bournemouth Martini, please. Shaken, not stirred.
The English Premier League season kicks off in a fortnight and I'll drink to that. Hope springs eternal even in Liverpool and Witton, even among the newbies, the newly promoted. Say hello (again) to Watford and Norwitch City, the "Canaries," if I recall and to AFC Bournemouth, yes hope springs even...WAIT! WHAT? What is "AFC" "Bournemouth," please?
The "Cherries." No. No cherries. Olives, please.
This is the dark side of soccer's promotion and relegation system, sometimes beguiling to us in the Great Republic. It is the promise to deceive. Watford and Norwitch are yo-yos, up-down, up-down but Bournemouth, it's their first time. The "Cherries" lose their cherries this year, and will lose frequently. I don't know who spiked their Martinis and with what but they won promotion somehow playing in something called "Dean Court," officially "Vitality Stadium." Now, Old Trafford seats 75,000, the Etihad is being expanded to 55,000, the Osama bin Ladens play in a 60,000 seater, Chelsea's bridge holds 42,000, Anfield 45,000. Fair amount of money comes from selling that many tix. Dean Court? Dean Court at Vitality Stadium is a cozy, little 11,700 seat bugger. Eleven thou...That's embarrassing. It's ridiculous. That would be too small even for an MLS stadium in the GR. It's a fraud on the English Premier League, a disgrace to the supporters of other real major league clubs and a cruel deception on the now delirious, soon to be humiliated 11,700 souls who attend Bournemouth matches and on their valiant, hopelessly overmatched heroes. Disgraceful all around.
The English Premier League season kicks off in a fortnight and I'll drink to that. Hope springs eternal even in Liverpool and Witton, even among the newbies, the newly promoted. Say hello (again) to Watford and Norwitch City, the "Canaries," if I recall and to AFC Bournemouth, yes hope springs even...WAIT! WHAT? What is "AFC" "Bournemouth," please?
The "Cherries." No. No cherries. Olives, please.
This is the dark side of soccer's promotion and relegation system, sometimes beguiling to us in the Great Republic. It is the promise to deceive. Watford and Norwitch are yo-yos, up-down, up-down but Bournemouth, it's their first time. The "Cherries" lose their cherries this year, and will lose frequently. I don't know who spiked their Martinis and with what but they won promotion somehow playing in something called "Dean Court," officially "Vitality Stadium." Now, Old Trafford seats 75,000, the Etihad is being expanded to 55,000, the Osama bin Ladens play in a 60,000 seater, Chelsea's bridge holds 42,000, Anfield 45,000. Fair amount of money comes from selling that many tix. Dean Court? Dean Court at Vitality Stadium is a cozy, little 11,700 seat bugger. Eleven thou...That's embarrassing. It's ridiculous. That would be too small even for an MLS stadium in the GR. It's a fraud on the English Premier League, a disgrace to the supporters of other real major league clubs and a cruel deception on the now delirious, soon to be humiliated 11,700 souls who attend Bournemouth matches and on their valiant, hopelessly overmatched heroes. Disgraceful all around.
