Saturdays were made by God so that people would be happy. In Britain that's why short-pants football games are scheduled Saturdays, in America college tackle football games, in China struggle sessions maybe I just made that up.
So this is Saturday and where I am this is America and I am American and there are teams of scholars playing tackle football all over the place. But I am not happy. :( See? I am not happy because Penn State plays Rutgers today. My unhappiness is nested, there is unhappiness within unhappiness and it is unhappiness all the way down.
I am unhappy first that Penn State still exists. Second, that it is still allowed to play tackle football, third that other schools deign to play Penn State and fourth that it is Rutgers who Penn State plays. They ought to call this the Criminal Cup and the trophy ought be an electric chair.
Ladies, gentlemen, friends, enemies, "Rutgers, the state university of New Jersey" is a pustule on the anus of mankind. There is no reason for God ever to have created Rutgers or the state of New Jersey for that matter, a smelly, pestilential, corrupt place with an obese man running for president. New Jersey's contribution to the Great Republic has been fumes. God, in his wisdom having created New Jersey, it is well that he put Rutgers there. Rutgers however is an embarrassment even to New Jersey as Penn State is even to Pennsylvania. Penn State, the scene of the most atrocious scandal ever to disgrace an American university, half a century in duration, is well-paired by the Creator this day with "Ruptures" for Ruptures scents the encounter, indeed all of American higher education with its own distinctive malodor.
There are, if somebody else hasn't been added to the list in the last few hours, eight scholars on the Rutgers tackle football team unavailable for duty this day. To be sure, scholar athletes are held, or are said to be held, to a higher standard of conduct than other students and it may well be that non-athlete Rutgers students would still be in good standing with the university if they had accumulated the same demerits viz, home invasion robbery, armed robbery, burglary, "slamming a woman against a concrete floor" as have these eight "Scarlet Knights," it may well be that at Rutgers or Penn State non-athlete scholars committing the same transgressions would be given extra credit for work outside the classroom or had their grades improved for going "the extra mile" or "The Second Mile" but however that may be the Rutgers football team is disadvantaged with these eight unavailable for duty to God, country, state, and university and wearing prison-striped instead of scarlet uniforms.
Of course, in every black cloud there is the silver lining, for every demerit we can find silvery merit, these are "teachable moments," after all, this is a university at the end of the day, and it speaks well for Rutgers that at the end of the recent day when five of the players were made to exchange scarlet uniforms for prison-stripes director of university athletics "Julie" "Hermann" delivered a silvery address to the (remainder of the) football team commending them for so well-representing dear old Rutgers as does Julie her ownself who found her place at dear old after being women's volleyball coach at Tennessee where her entire team accused her of teaching by fear, humiliation and emotional abuse, encouraging them by teaching that they were "whores, alcoholics, and learning disabled."
Julie has the back of Professor Kyle Flood, who leads football instruction at Rutgers but won't be leading it today or for the following two Saturdays on accounta Kyle has been suspended his own self for having the back of one of his players by contacting a fellow professor to get the child's grade changed so he could continue his Saturday studies. Kyle got the grade changed and the child continued with Saturdays--until he was one of those arrested in Operation Scarlet Pimpernel. Bet Kyle wishes he hadn't had that particular child's back, hoo-doggie.
Woe unto the world because of offenses; for it must needs be that offenses come, but woe to that man by whom the offense cometh.
God in his wisdom has seen fit to pair these two outstanding exemplars of American higher education today and also to join them with like-minded institutions in a group known as the Big 10 Conference. Which has twelve members. :o They join, et al, Ohio State University whose own star scholar athlete tweeted the excellent point that it was ludicrous for such as he to have to attend classes at all as everyone done knowed hisn major and all hisn teammates' majors was tackle football.
The judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether.
