The District of Columbia eviction police have been massing outside the White House waiting for the Inauguration of the 46th President of the United States, Joseph R. Biden. And just now Chief Justice Roberts has sworn in President Biden! The eviction authorities have cut a hole in the wall that former President Trump erected surrounding the White House. Two armed officers go up to the door of the White House and politely knock. 

The door quickly opens and the eviction officers enter. Former President Trump is believed to be still in the bunker beneath the White House, where he has been for many months. The press have one pool videographer with the officers. Let us go now to that live feed.

AND THERE IS MR. TRUMP IN A CORRIDOR OF THE BUNKER. AND HE IS ARMED! TRUMP IS ARMED! HE HAS HIS OWN ARMED SECRET SERVICE AGENTS ALONGSIDE HIM! The video feed is naturally shaky but you can clearly hear the sounds of a gun battle going on! Eviction police and fire fighters have now swarmed through the entrance to the White House and MORE GUNFIRE IS HEARD! A tremendous, continuous rat-a-tat-tat. 

And just as suddenly it stops! The gunfire has stopped...IT IS OVER! IT IS OVER! Mr. Trump is seen leaving the White House assisted by District police and firefighters, clutching his blanky. He is not resisting, Mr. Trump is not resisting.

And that's the way it is, January 20, 2021. A celebration of democracy. Good day, everyone.