Harvard science historian Owen Gingerich, who chairs the IAU planet definition committee, argued at a forum last month that "a planet is a culturally defined word that changes over time."
I wish to give my colleague Professor Gingerich a virtual high-five for that. Pluto is sooo 1930's. The culture of the 1930's defined Herbert Hoover as a "president" for heaven's sake. This is the 21st Century! Culture has changed! This epoch's culture demands that Kim Kardashian's ass be classified a planet.
...Gareth Williams, associate director of the IAU's Minor Planet Center, said that Pluto is not a planet, citing the official definition, which states that a planet is a celestial body that:
But, wait! We make further citation to the science publication cheezburger.com and this headline:
• Is in orbit around the sun.
• Is round or nearly round.
• Has "cleared the neighborhood" around its orbit, meaning it is not surrounded by objects of similar size and characteristics.
• Is round or nearly round.
• Has "cleared the neighborhood" around its orbit, meaning it is not surrounded by objects of similar size and characteristics.
Williams said Pluto failed on that third qualification, since it had several other "dwarf planets" near it and also overlaps Neptune's orbit at times.WhyKimKardashiansAssShouldBeAPlanetNOTPluto
Now, let's apply Professor Williams' criteria to Kim Kardashian's ass:
- It is on Earth which orbits around the sun. CHECK. (I think he'd buy that.)
- Is round or nearly round. Duh.
- "Has 'cleared the neighborhood'...is not surrounded by objects of similar size..." So, I think we have all three.
But, wait! We make further citation to the science publication cheezburger.com and this headline:
Kim Kardashian's Ass Totally Looks Like The Planet Jupiter.
Jupiter! Which we think is even bigger than Pluto. We wish to give Professor Cheezburger a fist-bump for that.
With this "weight," this "mass", this "heft" of cultural opinion "behind" us...Well, need we say more we think not.
