It becomes our disagreeable duty to report that there was a situation at Art Basel Miami Beach this eve-en-ing. A humongous bird crapped all over a donut.
No, I was just kidding, a humongous bird didn't crap on a donut.
Two women got into a fight.White Chinese women. (I humbly submit to self-criticism and struggle session for my SECOND slander of white people this week.) Both were patrons of the arts, not artists or anything too intense. One of the shoppers took up an X-Acto knife,
and stabbed the other in the neck and arms.
Yeah, take a minute to let that sink in, that's okay.
Fortunately, the injuries were non-life threatening although the victim-patron was taken to hospital. The "alleged" "perp" is Siyuan Zhao. Siyuan made the excellent point that she needed to stab the victim in the neck in order to "clean" her, and said, and I quote, "I had to kill her and two more. I had to watch her bleed." (emphasis added) Siyuan seems to have the situation of tweety birds flying around in the head.
The situation "caused some confusion," reports the Miami Herald, which does seem understandable:
Some patrons thought the stabbing was a performance art presentation.
Others believed the police tape cordoning an area of the convention center was part of an art installation.
Well, you can imagine.
That's a white woman!...Those are white women...Those are white women witnesses being interviewed by a member of the Third Estate.The white woman with "NO BOYFRIEND NO PROBLEM" on her shirt...See, that's the thing about great art: it makes you think. Is she saying she has no boyfriend, which would be understandable, ergo, she has no problem? Or, since "NO" is lined out dos is she saying she has a boyfriend problem. She has problems! She has a hair problem, a weight problem, she doesn't have an X-Acto problem though, for which we are grateful.
Inside the convention center, security guards and event organizers worked to quickly clean up the scene, and to keep public attention focused on the art and not the stabbing.
One bystander said he asked a security guard what has happened, and he was told that a very
expensive statue had fallen on someone.
So, yeah. That was the confusing scene in the Miami Beach Convention Center this eve-en-ing for Art Basel. We now return you to Earth.
Two women got into a fight.
and stabbed the other in the neck and arms.
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Yeah, take a minute to let that sink in, that's okay.
Fortunately, the injuries were non-life threatening although the victim-patron was taken to hospital. The "alleged" "perp" is Siyuan Zhao. Siyuan made the excellent point that she needed to stab the victim in the neck in order to "clean" her, and said, and I quote, "I had to kill her and two more. I had to watch her bleed." (emphasis added) Siyuan seems to have the situation of tweety birds flying around in the head.
The situation "caused some confusion," reports the Miami Herald, which does seem understandable:
Some patrons thought the stabbing was a performance art presentation.
Well, you can imagine.
“A guy walked up to me and said ‘I thought I saw a performance, and I thought it was fake blood, but it was real blood’,” [Artist Naomi] Fisher said.
Inside the convention center, security guards and event organizers worked to quickly clean up the scene, and to keep public attention focused on the art and not the stabbing.
One bystander said he asked a security guard what has happened, and he was told that a very
expensive statue had fallen on someone.
